hybrids//syntax error
A collaborative art installation exhibited as part of a larger research project.
We are living in an echo chamber. Trying to hear other voices, but they are just our own thoughts reflected back. If we can’t connect, we can’t be truly present. If we can’t connect we can’t relate, we can’t respond.
Each time I trace a tangle and add a few threads that at first seemed whimsical but turned out to be essential to the fabric, I get a bit straighter that staying with the trouble of complex worlding is the name of the game of living and dying well together on terra, in Terrapolis. We are all responsible to and for shaping conditions for multispecies flourishing in the face of terrible histories, and sometimes joyful histories too, but we are not all response-able in the same ways. The differences matter—in ecologies, economies, species, lives.(Staying with the trouble, Donna Haraway)
technology
camera input -> tochdesigner->analog tv
3D scan-> blender -> AE -> touchdesigner -> projector
project done in collaboration with computers
poster and photos: Natalia Kaftan
nigdy nie lubiłam kiedy ludzie zdrabniali moje imię
Nigdy nie lubiłam kiedy ludzie zdrabniali moje imię or I never said I liked it when you called me by a nickname is an art project I worked on in 2023/2024. It explores the dichotomy between my self and the fake self I created based on my upbringing, social pressure and being perceived as a woman. I have a female presenting body and it has been a source of pain and many difficulties. For too many years I tried to pretend I am something I am not. Discovering the truth about my identity manifested itself as years of discomfort and desperate trials to silence it.
Through experimentation with the digital/photographic fabric, I tried to create a visual representation of my psychophysical states and feelings that I kept to myself. Dissociation and feeling disconnected from my body resulted in unclear boundaries and preformative approach to daily life. I try to convey that through the poses I put my digital dolls in.
The title of the project is strictly connected to the polish langugage. My birth name- Martyna can be mispronounced and “sweetened” if you will, as Martynka. It is a common practice in Poland to cutify the names of kids or youths. In my opinion it works a little bit like the suffixes in japanese- if my name is Martyna it could be understood as a -san suffix, whereas Martynka would be a -chan. I never liked to be called Martynka. It sounds very girly, cute, it overflows with sweetness. It's just a small aspect of being perceived and referred to as a girl, but it's the small and daily things that hurt as well.
Here are fragments of a text that was a part of the installation
I never said I liked it when you called me by a nickname. Actually, the only people that I allowed to call me that, were my grandma and a few teachers, whom I was afraid to stand myself against. Martynka. Something about the sweet-girly sound of that word made me clench my fists, my eyes were filled with tears. Later on, I learned that it is supposed to be like that. There will be many things that will make me feel similarly and I can never, ever, actually cry. Tears in the eyes are a sign of femininity, crying is hysteria. I also discovered that the more I press my fingernails in the palm of my hand, the better I’ll hold back the tears. [...]
Where is the distinction between me and my body?
Right now I don’t even know how I look. I have some ideas and parts of information that I heard from others. Grandma always told me that I don’t look feminine enough. To be honest, I wish that was true. She didn’t like when I got my nose pierced. Grandma is dead now.
the work was exhibited in Cracow in Apteka Designu on Healing Queer Exhibition
project done in collaboration with my computer
theSpaceSeemsComforting
//syntax error
TheSpaceSeemsComfoting is a live A/V performance that I worked on in collaboration with Natalia Kaftan and Miłosz Laksa. Exploring the seeming comfort of the internet macro- and microcosm, we proposed a meditation-like experience and platform for collaborative reflection. Using the technology of Tonarium Lab we explored the 3D (12-channel) sound system that allowed us to make it a more immersive experience.
The performance itself was inspired by the composition of Dante's inferno and internet iceberg memes with each level being more intense. We explored the idea of the internet's niches and echo chambers that- although initially appearing ‘harmless’- expose people to more and more damaging and polarized content.
You open your eyes, but you don’t know where your contour is and where the surroundings start.
You allow yourself to be absorbed.
The nerve impulses in your muscles remind you of the physical form of your body, but the edges are blurred and you disturbingly feel one with what is not yours.
For a few moments you aren’t human.
Every sound is in you.
Thoughts and words are one.
Everything that is in you is you, and everything that comes to you stays with you forever.
Your body is soft, warm and heavy.
Everything is warm and heavy.
All your life you have been shape-shifting.
You enter.
The space seems comforting.
It’s endless, thoughtless and familiar.
It surprises.
You feel safe and comfortable. You don’t have a home.
You’re sleepy. You’re energized.
You don’t escape.
The space seems comforting.
You can’t see the door, but you know it’s limited.
It doesn't have a beginning or an end.
You don’t escape.
The space seems comforting.
Blur in front of your eyes.
Ambient in your ears.
Now it’s you.
You don’t escape.
The space seems comforting.
It offers relief.
You don’t escape.
The space seems comforting.
You quickly find out you can’t close your eyes.
You don’t escape.
The space seems comforting.
The space seems comforting.
The space seems comforting.
project done in collaboration with computers
technology
input content -> touchdesigner -> video synthesizer -> projector
input content -> touchdesigner -> analog video mixer -> analog tv
input content + synth + modular -> matrix -> SpatRevolution ->
-> 12-channel 3D sound system
photos: Antoni Bulanda, poster: Natalia Kaftan
miastoza
Miastoza is an artbook- a story about my relationship with living in Metropolis. Since starting my studies at the Academy of Fine Arts in Katowice I have been exploring the Silesia and Basin post-mining and post-industrial infrastructures. I like to think the Metropolis in literal and metaphorical ways relates to and shapes my life, expierience and thought patterns. The grid/map/network connects threats that couldn’t be intertwined in different circumstances. For me, metropolis is about the Haraway’s staying with the trouble. It tells the stories of residents- not only people and animals, but nature, paths, climate, emotions, atmosphere, ambiance, random events and organized, planned motives.
I want to stay with the trouble, and the only way I know to do that is in generative joy, terror, and collective thinking. (Donna Haraway)
The name miastoza in Polish language can be interpreted in a number of ways. Firstly it resambles and sounds like an illness and comments a spreading cancer-like growth of the city. But it is also a wordplay as it can be read as miasto (city) and a syllable “za” that is the first part of words like zauważone (observed), zastane (found in existing condition), zasłyszane (heard).
The project consists of and artbook and a zine in map format. The poem is by my friend Szymon Biedronka.
project done in collaboration with my computer
technology
touchdesigner+processing+AE+analog input->photoshop->iD->print
VJ it yourself//syntax error
New media made accessible. Our art collective is a group of people, who wandered in the ocean of tutorials, reddit threads and wikipedia pages. That process, although sometimes satisfying, can make one feel frustrated. VJ it yourself was an event, where we introduced the art of vj’ing to a larger audience. We wrote simple programs in Touchdesigner that could be easily and intuitively modified.
The appeal of becoming a VJ is obvious: we are junkies for power and flash. We imagine ourselves as Zeus or Thor at the eye of the hurricane, casting our lightning bolts above the fray. We look out with satisfaction across the swirling clouds.
(The VJ book, Spinrad Paul)
project done in collaboration with computers
poster: Natalia Kaftan
he is going (he does not move)
Sometimes I feel like a character from Beckett’s book. I am put in a space, where I don’t want to be, but everyday I choose to stay. I freeze. I am waiting for Godot. Instead of a friend, rock and a tree, I have an algorithm that makes me feel nauseous but never tired. I’m living in between. I am consuming images of other people’s lives as crumbles of real, authentic being. I don’t try as I’m too scared of failing.
“Too alive to die and too dead to live” (Byung Chul Han)
project done in collaboration with my computer
paintings and printmaking
oil on canvas
I am every person I have ever loved
Miss Communication
Sometimes it do be like that
Cyberspace
a diptique I did for exhibition in collaboration with Silesian Philharmonic
soon:
Cyfrowe Konfrontacje, ASP Gdańsk, 2024
Cudeńka, Kraków, 2024
Brave New World: vj, syntax error, Warszawa, 2024
Hiatus Festival, syntax error, Poznań, 2024
Przykro Mi, Wrocław, 2024
recent:
Spoiwo art collective: creation of an anti-stressful toy for horses in collaboration with Przystań Ocalenia Foundation, 2023
Spoiwo art collective: project and painting a mural on Academy of Fine Arts in Katowice campus
Miraże exhibition: a collective art exhibition in Szałfynster Gallery in Katowice, 2024
WUD exhibition: a collective art exhibition Sztuka Polecania as part of the World Usability Day Silesia Festival, 2024
Hybrids: art installation in minus one artspace, Katowice, 2024
Healing Queer: a collective LGBTQ+ exhibition in Design Pharmacy in Cracow, 2024
Interferencje: a collective art exhibition in collaboration with Silesian Philharmonic
Truskawkowa Pełnia: a collective exhibition in Rondo Sztuki, Katowice 2024
Miastoza: self-published artbook, 2024
TheSpaceSeemsComforting: a/v performance in Tonarium, Katowice, 2024
Fatal Exception: a/v performance in Tonarium, Katowice, 2024
Production of a internation art show UrbanArtCircle, Bielsko-Biała, 2023
@maru_drobczyk
gmail: martyna.drobczyk@aspkat.edu.pl